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Fractured Fallacies of a Finagling Fact Finder and Obfuscating Humorist

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A Woman's Guide To The Universe

Breastfeeding In Public: The Controversy! The Scandal!

Breastfeeding in public is close to everyone’s heart. Well, almost everyone. There are a few hold outs, who refuse to relax and go with the flow. Recently, a young mother was offended because she was asked to remove herself, her breasts, and her child from church because she was breastfeeding during the service. Seems some people were offended by the sight.

Every time a version of this problem pops up, or out, invariably there are protests and cries of how ‘natural’ breastfeeding is, so that anyone who objects to uncovered breastfeeding in public is a rigid, anti-baby, anti-mother, anti-bunny-rabbit jerk who’s never had sex, much less a kind thought or emotion.

And they’re probably Republican, to boot.

Sure, breastfeeding is natural, but why do people want to keep shoving things in people’s faces (so to speak) who are uncomfortable with them? We keep yapping about the multicultural diversity that is America (cue the patriotic music, please), but on the other hand, no one respects the sensibilities of those multi cultures, ages, or genders.

I don’t know who said, “I don’t care if men don’t like it,”  but presumably it was said by a woman. Why is that woman disrespecting the sensibilities of all men?

As far as I’m concerned, sex, going to the bathroom, bathing, and a bunch of other functions are perfectly natural, but no one is insisting on their right to do them in public. If they do them anyway, they get arrested.

Don’t tell me these functions can’t be compared to breastfeeding. If one is defended as ‘natural’, then they all are.

Some of these ‘babies’ involved in these disputes look old enough to start law school. The baby referred to in the article about the offended mother, is 19 months old, which for the math challenged is almost two years. But saying 19 months sounds so much more ‘babyish’ doesn’t it?

Look at this kid. He’s making his Sunday School class jealous:

breastfeeding in public on chezgigi.com

Would these mothers seriously have us believe that their two plus year old kids have gone without solid food their entire lives and have survived solely on a liquid diet? If they tell me the only thing their toddlers have as sustenance every day is breast milk, I’ll call them breastfeeding fibbers.

So, why can’t they feed them a meal before church, or wherever they’re going, or pump breast milk into a bottle for this law school graduate kid?

I know I’m supposed to be sympathetic to these moms, but I’m not feeling the love. What I’m feeling is extreme annoyance. Nurse however long you want, we don’t care. It becomes a problem when your kid throws his car keys on the table, and says, “When’s dinner, Mom? I took the bar today, and I’m famished!” And Mom whips it out. Just don’t whip it out in church.

Really? You think this is okay in church, or anywhere else people are trying to have a polite society? Two of these pictured kids were already paying taxes when this picture was taken!

breastfeeding in public on chezgigi.com

This is breastfeeding porn.

 

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6 Comments

  1. Will Jennings

    I actually heard a women say about breastfeeding her 4 year old, “It’s not just the milk, it’s our bonding.”

    Does anyone hear the sound of a helicopter?

    • I did! I wonder how she bonds with her hubby or new puppy? Well, the whole breastfeeding thing is out of control. When the kids are big enough to go to school….

  2. John Mallon

    Gigi, great article. Loved “You think this is okay in church, or anywhere else people are trying to have a polite society?”

    Should we make the lady prove she is lactating and not just dictating.

    • Dictating! That would be trick, talking through your breasts! Yep, I’m just not ‘on board’ with it, John. And I’ve taken much flack for my ‘position’. Haha! Breastfeeders of eight year olds are very aggressive.

  3. Wolfman

    Once again you breasted the problem. I find it odd the things that people feel are their rights. Regardless of whom else it may offend.
    Whats next potty training on the public transportation. Honey mooning in a cab. we all know where to draw the line. Most people like these just want to throw tantrums for their imagined rights.
    If I were eating a sausage Mc muffin would an Islamic or Jewish person have the right to beat me around the head and shoulders because he felt offended? I think that this takes very little thinking to make a proper Judgment call. Keep at it My Love. We the sane people all support you :>}

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