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Fractured Fallacies of a Finagling Fact Finder and Obfuscating Humorist

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A Woman's Guide To The Universe

Daylight Savings Time, Inauguration Day And Whether They’ll ‘Close’ In Surgery

Daylight Savings Time draws nigh.

So does Inauguration Day. By the time that day draws very nigh, it’ll be dark early, which is perhaps fitting. (I don’t really think so; I just thought I’d join in the End of the World wailing.)

Election Day almost feels anti-climactic and it hasn’t come and gone, yet. Let me tell you why I’m confused.

I made everybody (in this house) ‘fall back’ at midnight on Sunday, October 30, because I was positive it was time to do that. Putatively, I should have been the grateful recipient of an extra hour to goof around.

But I was wrong about the day. It’s next week- November 06- that we change our clocks, and I didn’t get that extra hour.

daylight savings time on chezgigi.com

So what happened? Nothing, that’s what. I slept the same amount of time, and wasted the same amount of time. Well, my guy was almost late for work, but nothing happened to ME.

Getting that fictional hour was anti-climactic, too. I should just call myself Aunty Climactic, and get it over with.

Daylight Savings Time was invented long, long ago by a seventh grader, if you can believe it. He’d stayed up late reading under the covers with a flashlight. The Hardy Boys were solving some mystery of the clock tower, and he overslept the next morning, and was gonna be late for school.

It just so happens this kid was some high political mucky-muck’s offspring. He whined so much at breakfast the next day, his dad just put all the clocks back to shut him up.

So now , the rest of us have to remember a ‘special’ day two times a year, just because of some brat who’s probably dead and gone by now.

daylight savings time on chezgigi.com

What I want to know is WHY I didn’t get an extra hour when I did the EXACT same thing I’m gonna do next week to all the clocks? Well, except for the oven clock. That one’s always blinking anyway, no matter what I do to it.

Not getting that extra hour is just one example of things that aren’t meant to work, but are put out there to fool us. Another example is temperature gauges that supposedly regulate the air conditioning or the heat at your place of work.

Did you know it will let you push it a hundred times and PRETEND it’s working, but it doesn’t do a thing? Uh-huh. Whatever temperature change you feel after your little display of take charge-ish-ness is all in your tiny mind.  Or menopausal body.

Same with elevator buttons. Push those ‘door close’ buttons all you want, once you figure out which arrows mean what, and the guy who runs the building gets to hear Mick Jagger sing ‘I Can’t Get No Satisfaction.’ Yeah, when you push those elevator buttons you’re indulging an over-the-hill rocker.

And speaking of healthcare, I was seriously wondering what would happen if Trump won and abolished the present health insurance plans?

Would they make an announcement on Inauguration Day, and once the docs hear it on the PA in the operating theater (I hate that term; what, are they just acting it out? “Here, Charlie. You pretend to hold the scalpel and cut there, and I’ll make a frowny face.”), they’d refuse to close?

It’s gonna be tough walking around with the stuff inside falling out. So revealing.

 

 

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1 Comment

  1. working husband/grateful provider

    Huh, what time is it anyway huh!

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