Halloween and trick or treating are not to be missed this year. I haven’t been trick or treating since my son was about ten, and then I let him do the knocking and hold his pumpkin treat collecting toy thing, while I waited in the shadows, dressed as the Invisible Parent.
It was a nice, easy costume.
But it’s all different now. There’s a political ad in Nevada about Halloween, trick or treating, and pot.
We’re supposed to vote against it, I think. That’s all I remember. Except I do recall that the video showed a goofy looking pumpkin treat shell being dumped of all its goodies and a little girl unwrapping a sucker.
Presumably, she’s about to have a REAL good time.
As you can see, the only parts of the ad that stuck with me were the treats and the recreational pot supposedly stuck right in them. I’m not that savvy; how do you put pot in a sucker?
Who do they think they’re kidding, anyway? Parents comb through this stuff the minute it comes home, and half of it gets hidden in their closets as soon as the kids disappear to put on their jammies.
I can’t wait until my son comes home with three or four pumpkins worth of ‘treats.’ He’s twenty five now, so I’ll have no problem sending him out trick or treating.
“Did you go down this block, yet? It looks like some people with extra pot live along here.”
You start to eat those treats, and you’ll be overcome with an inexplicable urge to keep eating them. As if that doesn’t happen every year anyway, but NOW! Oh, now, the haul will be ‘special’.
Clearly, America has reached an impasse of some kind. For years, I’ve been listening to the arguments in favor of pot being legalized: “A stoned driver is safer than a drunk one.” “Alcohol is more dangerous than pot.” “Legalize pot and keep the jails free for insider traders.”
The arguments were compelling and after just fifty or eighty years, finally someone paid attention. Marijuana isn’t all that legal yet, but the penalties for ‘holding’ a pumpkin full of pot are less onerous.
What a relief!
But some parents are never happy. They started going around asking for gluten free, cruelty-to-underdeveloped-countries-free, pet healthy candy from unsuspecting house dwellers. Now they’ll add pot free trick or treat candy.
For crying out loud. They aren’t thinking this through. Get a grip, people!
Instead of hopped up kids full of sugar, you’ll have kids full of sugar, but very relaxed and mellow ones. What more could you want of Halloween?
We got rid of fresh fruit treats that may be hiding razors. We got rid of treats that were homemade. (This was actually a ploy by the big food companies. Now, everyone has generic candy bought at the local supermarkets. The big corporations won that one.)
Now they’re going after your pot in nefarious, original ways. They’re (I don’t know who ‘they’ are) are sure you’re willy nilly bestowing your recreational pot in the kids’ treats.
Who would do this, I don’t know. I can see giving up a stray razor now and then; they weren’t expensive or especially valued. But pot?
This is not an amendment fought for by the food companies. “The more treats you eat, the more you want!” would be their motto.
I’m off now to find out who’s behind this amendment taking up space on the ballot.
I’ll go later, though. I’m waaaaay too….something….. to go out right….. now. Are there any more of those Mary Janes?